To my future daughter-in-law

We have not yet met. I do not know your name, but I want you to know that on October 18th, 2001 I was thinking of you. Your husband is a child of divorce. It was not an easy time for him and I'm sure that he still has moments of trying to figure it all out. But I did it for him and his sister and myself, and for you.

The Randy I know today is kind and gentle and loving and energetic and entertaining and fun and loyal and hard working and honest - Not to mention being quite handsome as well. He has the makings of a perfect husband. (I know that there really isn't such a thing) But at the age of eight, as sweet as he was, he was becoming a product of his environment. Being allowed (some would say - even taught) to disrespect his mother and other females, I was worried about the man that he would become. If there is such a thing as a family curse, we had one. And I was not going to allow it to ruin the lives of my children and future grandchildren. The cycle of abuse and violence had to be broken.

Respect is a wonderful thing and I am happy to be married now to a man who treats me like gold. He has his flaws just as we all do, but he has set an example for our family. He loves me for who I am and wants the best for me. That is the kind of husband that I want my son to be to you.

Randy has two fathers - both completely different from one another. Opposites. Where one has strengths, the other is lacking and vice versa. He has learned great things from both of them. He has had the opportunity to live in two different worlds. I pray that he continues to choose to take the best qualities from both role models into his own life.

We all do the best we can. Seeing my children grow up to have happy, healthy families will make me a content old woman.