Why I Want to Kill my Husband

Lets see how many google hits I get with that title!

Every frickin' day!!!!
Our alarm clock is 20 min. fast. Hubby wanted it that way. It is on his side of the bed since I don't have an outlet on my side. I always go to bed before he does. I set the alarm for 7:30 (or 10 after 7 real time) each day and put it at a comfortable volume. Hubby comes in how ever many minutes or hours later and sets the alarm for 7:00 and puts the volume up to the maximum level.

7 a.m. (or 6:40 real time) I am wakened by some high decible heavy metal song. Hubby doesn't move. I can't reach over him to turn off the offending noise so I shake him and ask him to please turn the thing off. His hand fumbles around the table hitting the lamp and finally finding the snooze button on the alarm clock. I know that I don't have to get up for another half hour so I lay there and eventually drift off to sleep.

7:09 Repeat

7:18 Repeat

7:27 Repeat. Getting angrier. I know that It's really only 7:07 and I don't really have to get up for another 20 minutes or so. So I lay there.

7:36 I get up. I walk around the bed, turn off the alarm and make a smart ass remark. Hubby replies with a grunt and "huh?"

7: 45 I walk back into the bedroom to find Hubby snoring. I tell him the time. He says, "yeah, I'm getting up."

7:55 Repeat.

8:00 (7:40 real time) Hubby emerges from the bedroom, wanders into the kitchen and says good morning. His breath is terrible. He kisses me with his pasty morning mouth as if nothing is wrong and I should be happy to see him.

8:01 I stab him with a kitchen knife and go back to bed.