Flood Warnings

MY TOILET JUST EXPLODED! I was leaning over the toilet, running the cold water in the bathtub to rinse it out when suddenly I was hit in the face with a high pressure stream of cold water. At first, I thought that the shower had come on and was pointed out of the tub, but then I saw that the flexi-pipe thingy that's attached to the toilet popped off. It was spraying at such a speed. I was drenched. The water was hitting the ceiling and cascading back on top of my head. I scrambled to turn off the bathtub water, forgetting which way was off. That didn't help. I found a knob behind the toilet and was finally able to get the water off. By this time, I was soaked to the bone and standing in a pond of cold water. Even the hall carpet was wet. I took off all my clothes and ran to get towels to soak up the water before it seeped into the basement. I emptied my linen closet onto the bathroom floor and caught a glimpse of my naked self in the bathroom mirror - dripping with water and shivering - and I had to laugh. I had wanted to enjoy a hot bath before the kids got home from school. Instead, I had a cold shower without soap. The toilet paper and the Kleenex are a soggy withered mess. Even the picture hanging on the wall in the bathroom is wet behind the glass. My bathtub is piled to the top with soaked towels. I've put my hair up in a ponytail and am off to get the kids from school. Did I say that I don't need a vacation??? I take that back!