Excuses

Here's a list of today's jobs and the reason why I won't be applying for them:

Housekeeping Room Attendant:Specific Skills: Sweep, mop and wash floors, Dust furniture, Vacuum carpeting, area rugs, draperies and upholstered furniture, Make beds and change sheets, Clean and disinfect bathrooms and fixtures, Handle and report lost and found items, Attend to guests' requests for extra supplies or other items, Provide basic information on facilities, Pick up debris and empty trash containers. Have you seen my house?

Registered practical nurse: Not a nurse

Grinder - metal products manufacturing: I like my fingernails

Collection legal assistant: I can't even collect court ordered child support.

Proofreader: Ha Ha Ha! Spell check is my proofreader

Dishwasher: I'm done with anything restaurant related...AND...Have you seen my house?

Air conditioning and refrigeration mechanic: I'm afraid of electricity

Stock receiver: Education: Completion of college/CEGEP/vocational or technical training, Completion of university
Credentials (certificates, licences, memberships, courses, etc.): Forklift Operator Certification
Experience: 3 - 5 years Huh? You need university training and 5 years experience to count boxes?

Pet groomer: Gross!

Home support worker: Aid clients with bathing and other aspects of personal hygiene - Again...Gross!

Butcher: Gross

Cook: Would I need references? 'Cause they'd be hard to get.