It's hard to believe that it's already been a month since our baby was born. I went to his grave site yesterday and found that the blue orchids (or were they lilies?) are still alive and beautifully covering the tiny mound of dirt. I've ordered the stone but am having trouble figuring out what to have engraved on it. In a section reserved for babies and children, there are some inscriptions there which bring tears to my eyes. I really liked the one that said "Born into the arms of Jesus", but it is close to our plot and I don't want to be a copy cat. "Forever in our hearts" is fitting but also way overused. There are two inscriptions I'm considering:
"So Small, So Sweet, So Soon" and "A Dream Lies Here". I don't want to regret my choice as it will be carved in stone quite literally. I wish I could think of perfect, beautiful, poetic words to mark the spot where he lies. But my mind is blank, My heart and my womb empty. I never got to bring him home. I never got to hear his voice. I never got to look into his eyes. I've begun the process of giving away things that were to be his and putting away the baby stuff we'd collected. It hurts. It is painful. It is final.
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I can't imagine having to do this: picking out a small saying or scripture or verse that fully encompasses my grief and my child's short life. I can think of many scriptures and many words that fit, but not sure which ones, if any, I would want in stone for eternity.
Let me think on this.
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